From PS to BS

Those who have studied in PS will acknowledge the fact that the place was terrificly managed. Though there were about a thousand children, everything worked in clockwork precision, and there was always second helping of everything, and you were a happy, well-fed, cog in the wheel. But the HS (and comparing the two has become something of a hobby now)was a different story altogether. Here are some examples of some lessons for managers, in how NOT to manage things.

Lets begin with the lunch. In PS, since there were so many children, everyone was not
'called' for lunch at once. Instead, each class would be called for lunch one after the other. So, that way, by the time one class was called, almost all the other guys would have finished their lunches (except those who ate slowly who would be made to sit in the sisters' side, and then eat slower). However, the system in HS was something else.

A bell would signify we could leave school and walk to the hostel. And then another in the hostel to announce that lunch was ready. Then, a second bell to say we better get our asses in the hall, and quickly. Now, when everyone was in the hall, everyone would take their plates, get served (“Brother, some more vegetable? Limited. Brother, some more dal? Limited. Brother, some more buttermilk? “Sai Ram”, a divine way of saying 'Buzz off').

We would wait for everyone to take their plates, and after the last guy has taken his plate, the prayer would begin. Now, imagine the plight of the guy who was the first to take his plate. Poor guy must have been hungry, and probably ran to take his plate, but now has to wait for the last guy, who would sashay in at his own sweet pace, and take his seat. Then, the prayers would begin, but not before Rammohan sir would first give some important announcements, or just some arbit gyan. Once that was done, Om would be chanted thrice, followed by the gayatri mantra, chanted thrice, in slow motion. This was then followed by the Sai gayatri, thrice, in slow motion, followed by Bramharpanam, in slow motion. Now, think again about that hungry guy who was the first to take his plate. His mood feels like shit, and his food has gone cold, but he has to eat it nevertheless. And there will be two 12th std guys standing by him, in case he turns to tell the guy next to him that his food tastes like shit.

Another rule that perplexed me was the whole 'not entering other's room' thing. The history behind the rule was that once, Swami had said, “Boys are not studying. They only keep going to each other's rooms like cats and dogs.” Now, anyone with an IQ over 100 would tell you, the emphasis is on 'not studying'. There's something called inference. But no.

The rule was that you could not enter others' rooms. So, if you wanted to talk to someone, you had to do it while standing on the threshold of the room. And if you wanted to talk something in private, well, you know the kind of implication saying, “Aye fellow, come out na, I want to talk to you about something in private” would have there.

And now, what happened if you broke the room? You were made to live in that room. Your luggage would be shifted into that room, and you had to sit there during study hours too. I found this rule baffling, but extremely enjoyable. During my three years, I stayed in a number of my friends' rooms, and it was always great fun. Of course, you had to endure a few PHWs on the way, but it was alright.

Among the other gems was the one for money spending. Now, we all knew spending money is a vice and it was important to think beyond the banal, and the materialistic. Point noted. Now how we do go about it? Don't let the students handle money. In its place, introduce a total kickass foolproof, desire-curbing method that made the Lehman brothers seem like Lava and Kusha. It went like this.

If you wanted to buy something, you did not use cash. Instead, there were yellow slips on which you wrote your name, your roll number, the item you wish to buy, and the price, and then signed on it. This was terrific, for those who had money and wanted to buy. It was also terrific for those who wanted to enjoy life's little pleasures (like Fruit Salad for dinner) without having to bother about little obstacles like paying for it. So what you did was you took a slip, thought of the biggest asshole in the class, wrote his name, roll number, and signed on it. There, you had what you wanted, without having to stoop into the maya of the finances of it.

Not surprisingly, some people of the class had a negative 3000 rupees in their accounts, inspite of only eating Satwik produce that was prepared by Dr. Nilakantha under the able hands of cooks who sometimes burnt their sins along with the food. After about two months, everyone realised that this would not work. To the utter dismay of many of us, this system was replaced by another terrific system, the Credit Card system. The Credit Card system was announced to us in the Prayer Hall by Rammohan sir, as being the Masthishka Putra of Janardhan sir.

The Credit Card was another stroke of ingenuity that would put investment bankers to shame. The Credit Card was a rectangular card, that had numbers printed on both sides. So you had 0.5, 1, 1.5, 2... and so on till 50. If you want to buy something from the stores, you approached your class sir for a card. Your finances were checked and you were issued a Card. The guy in stores would take your card, and punch on it whatever was the amount of the item you took. If you wanted to buy something more than 50 bucks, you had to take two cards.

Our swindling brothers got around this one too. You first bought something worth 5 rupees or so, and then hold the card from the punched side, covering the hole that had been punched. But it was too much risk and if you could got caught, you'd get punched yourself.

The end result was that you thought of the process of buying from the stores too cumbersome. Instead, you walked past the stores, looking longingly at the all the things you would have bought, if not for this galeej idea. Your desires were never curbed, they were only limited to 50 bucks.

Crazy shit!

Favourite foods

I know Annam is Brahma. But then we all have our favourite Gods, don't we? So, I think I can safely go about listing my favourite foods without my name going to mam, or my soul going to hell. When I would go home in the holidays and people would ask me what sort of food they gave us in school, I really didn't know what to say. Was is South Indian food? Or North Indian? Or Continental? I think it was Heavenly. I have had food every single day since I left the school :-) and I have to admit, nothing matches up to the kind of food we were given there. Not a patch. Here a list of my favourite foods. You tell me yours.

Vada: I have had what Mumbaikars call 'vada', the one they put in the vada-pav, and I can't help smirking. Those guys have no idea what an actual vada is. I mean, the original brown vada, the vada with the hole. The vadas in PS were big, round doughnuts that were crisp as they were tasty. I have had vadas outside, and they were all either chewing-gummy, or dripping with so much oil that they would give Iraq a complex. But the vadas in PS were to be eaten to be felt. And you could take as many idlis as you pleased, but it was only one vada per kundalini chakra. This made the vadas even more pricey. I remember a friend of mine and me once were supposed to serve breakfast before morning darshan. We flicked handfulls of vadas, ran to the pantry and started stuffing ourselves. Sadhna mam caught us, nearly yanked our ears off and told our class teacher about it. I was let off, but he had to forego his 'tray chance'. I am still undecided if it was worth it. I mean, eating three of those vadas was moksha in itself.

Chitraannam and Pongal: The name Chitraannam gives me memories of Keya aunty going around with the vessel, screaming 'Sitraanaam Sitraanaam' and everyone in the line raising their hands like Nazi officers. Chitraannam was rice mixed with a bit of ecstacy and spruced with groundnuts. Chitraannam was perhaps the most common breakfast, but we never got enough of it. And come Shivratri, and the joy was taken a level higher. Hot chitraannam coupled with delicious, palm-licking good Sweet Pongal. We followed a simple process to eat. First hog Chitraannam till your tongue is on fire, then lick Pongal till you can't eat anymore sweet. Then switch to Chitraannam and continue the process till you have to rush to East Prashanti to answer the best preacher's call. Vicious circle it was, and we jumped right into it.

Rasam: While the above items were given on an on and off basis, the one thing that truly stayed with you through thick and thin, through Sunday and Morning darshan, through haircuts and own baths, was Rasam. And if you didn't like any of the items, you could always raise your plate and wash it down with the slurpy rasam with a loud surrrrrrrrrrrr. Any mention of rasam would be incomplete without 'Top Part' and 'Down Part'. The bucket of rasam would be divided into Top Part and Down Part. The top part was red and spicy and surrrr worthy, whereas the Down Part had pulses, which could be mixed with rice. Rasam was also used to eat chapathi. The rice area of the plate would be filled with rasam, and then the chapathi laid right in the middle till it grew soft. Then layers of the chapathi would be peeled off and devoured.

Mango Pickle: I don't know if many of you remember this, but it was one of the best parts about Sunday lunches in PS. The pickle would come in plastic buckets, and each of us would be given a dollop full of it, one piece and lots of gravy. This pickle was explosively kaaram and greed could lead you to the Medical Room. I am yet to see a pickle that is as red as the pickle that we were given there. And we came up with our own ways of eating it. We used to lick off all the gravy, and then wash the pickle and chew the piece as if we were 90s rappers chewing on some really expensive gum. I know it sounds kind of gross now, but back then, that was the extent we went to retain the taste of the pickle in our mouths.

Orange Laddoo: This was not technically a food item, but a prasadam. If any of you have watched Meerkat Manor, you would understand the behavioral pattern that occurs when the big brothers are called in to get the vessels of sweets from the Interview Room. This was the only time when no one spoke. When they would step out, all the younger lot would crane up their necks to see what it was. Most of the time it was the laddoo. But there were two types of laddoos. One was the common type, the type given in the South Indian Canteen, which had raisins and cashews in them. But then, there was the other sort, the orange Motichur laddoo that was given by G. Pulla Reddy. I don't know who he is, but if I ever meet him, I shall go and hug him. So, Mr. Reddy's laddoos were totally fabulous. The Orange laddoo was softer and juicier. I don't think I ever took just one sweet. I would invariably take two or more.

Swami's Food: I still don't know what this was. I have only had it once, but the smell of it drove me crazy. This was cooked by Headmistress aunty for Swami daily and was sent to Swami's place. One 7th standard guy was sent to give the food to the Sevadal outside Poornachandra Auditorium, to be given to Swami. I got this 'chance' once, and I remember fighting the urge to open it and check what it is that was actually being cooked. I also tasted it once, it looks a bit like rice mixed in Sambar, but the taste is something I have never, ever had anywhere again. Whenever I see come across the cuisine of any new place, the first thing I do is to check if its the same 'Swami's food', but I have never come across anything similar to heavenly food.

Other foods that came pretty close but lost out:

Bonda kaddi: Made of besan, bonda kaddi was quite a rare occurrence when it came to lunches. However, a lot of people feel that the bonda kaddi can be easily found in places and so does not have the sense of exclusivity that some of the above mentioned items.

Green peas curry: Green peas curry was another favourite of everyone. One thing I remember about the curry is that if you dint eat it immediately, it would form a thin, green layer on top of it. Green peas curry was perhaps the most commonly served food item among those mentioned here, and again, this works against it.

Mealmaker curry: We were in class three or four, and we were serving dinner to the new first standard guys when one of them raised his hands, and asked for 'chicken'. I was shocked out of my wits, but soon realised he was talking about the curry. Mealmaker curries were quite popular among seniors who bullied juniors and it is perhaps the unhappy memories that are associated with the curry that stop me from putting it on to the list.

So there you go, I have given you my list of favourite foods. Go ahead and gimme yours.

Have you ever wondered how as children we always wanted to grow up?

Talks of 'that school', own baths, writing with a pen, all the activities that proved that we had grown up were sought after. To be big, grown up, a 'big brother' was cool.

I remember the chanting of 'Bramharpanam'. The 7th standard guys were 'called for lunch' last. We were given the mats that were near the wall. We would all put out backs straight and say 'Bramharpanam' in a bass voice, sounding like puppies trying to roar.

And then Own Bath. Fifth standard was probably the worst of all the years. You were grown up enough to start hitting on 12th standard girls, but everyday for half an hour, you were at the mercy of amma, stripped off all your prestige. And then, come 6th standard, and we would arrive with buckets and mugs, and our initials written boldly on them. And even then, after you have had your 'own' bath, your hair was combed.

Sitting in the lines during Sports and watching 'big brothers' perform their activities. And then coming back to the hostel and enacting all the stunts again. Or looking at those ultra fair form boys with green stubbles, and then touching your own chin and realising that's a long way off.

And getting to write with ink pens. Fighting for Hero pens and proudly showing off ink stains on the shirt pockets, and Bluetooth in our mouths. And placing 'orders' for items crucial to the country's economy, like Natraj Plasto 621 Eraser and Luxor Sketch Pens.

It was always about growing up.

And now, I am grown up. I have my own bath everyday (well, almost), I have a different kind of Bluetooth in my pocket, and shaving is a pain. And now that I have done everything I wanted to do as a child, I want to go back.

I think elders realise the value of Children's Day more than the kids themselves. The poor guys are bombarded with boring stories of Chacha Nehru and stuff. We veterans, meanwhile, are cruelly reminded of an age when nothing was more important than getting hold of the magnet and radium.

Happy Children's Day, oldies!!

PUNISHMENTS

According to the Right to Education Act, that was enacted across the nation from the first of April this year, there are some major changes that are to take place in our education system. Primary among them is abolishing corporal punishment for children.

Like most of you, I thought it was laughable to imagine being a student in Parthi and not getting a few knocks now and then. How I wish this law was enacted way back in the 90s.

Or may be not. I mean, what would be the fun if every teacher was sweet and kind and nice? The world would have been beautiful and everyone would be form boys. Not fun.

Fact is, life for me was going from one knock to another. When your entire life is dictated by a bell, you cannot be a slow coach. I was always late for everything., dunnapotha or slow coach as we were called. And no, my birthday is in April, so I could not even be f'irst for lunch'. So right from Suprabhatam to Night Prayers, my body was undergoing tough physical kung fu style training.

The day would begin by Suprabhatam, for which I would be late. Even if I was on time, I'd doze and somebody would 'write my name'. This meant that in half an hour, I was going to get a tight whack with a cane on my hand. The Praveena Hand Whack (PHW).

The PHW was generally doled out after the morning Yoga session. For best results, it was conducted in cold, winter days on the terrace. A minder would read out all the names of the sinners who had the audacity of dozing during a prayer session that could put an owl to sleep. You were asked to stretch out your hand, and...

WHACK!! A thin cane came whipping down on your palm. The trick to minimise the pain of the PHW was a scientific process. You had to bring your hand down at the exact moment when the stick came down on you. Morning shows the day, and without doubt, more such endearments would be in store for me through the day. We were given 30 glorious minutes to finish breakfast, bath, and get ready for school. As usual, I was late. Once the dreaded Second Bell went off, I would rush to school. Without doubt, the prayer would have started and I would be among the others to sit outside the hall. Once the prayer was over, it was time for Bitex.

I dont know why its called that. Bitex. Sounds like some scabies ointment or something. But bitex would be used on us a lot. It was the usual uthak-baithak, but sprinkled with some creativity by Principal Sir. So you had to do a hundred of them, and each with Aamir Khan like perfection, while he would personally count. Here again, the easier way was to keep your hands on your knees, so it was easier when you were standing up, somewhere in the Nervous Nineties. So by the time you reached the class, your hands and knees felt like Shane Bond's. And then, you missed the first few minutes of class and got a few mottikayis for that.

The mottikayi was an indigenous home-bred torture weapon that could give foreign imports like Bitex a run for their money. The teacher would roll his hand into a fist, knuckles pointing down. And then raise his arm in a backlift, and wham, it came crashing down on your head. Though the mottikayi involved no sticks, two or three of these could leave you wondering if your head had become a golf ball.

But these were just physical punishments. They would heal in a while, and if they dint, you could always go to the dispensary and hope Ram Mohan Sir didn’t stab you with an injection. But the worst tortures are the mental ones. The ones that break you from inside. I have been subjected to three levels of such tortures.

Pantry Cleaning was the first of them. I have been subjected to it not once, but twice. The trick to seeing the quality of food in a hostel is by seeing the dust bins. The amount of stuff in the dust bin clearly indicated the students' opinion of the food. Now, the punishment involved cleaning the dust bin and then taking a stick and making sure none of the food particles got stuck in the pantry. If you were faint-hearted, you could faint somewhere in between due to the stench. Thankfully, John would give you a few whacks to render you senseless and so you couldn't make out the smell too much. There was no way you could escape this punishment, and there were no shortcuts, as John would personally come and check if everything was in order.

Cleaning the toilets was the next one. This one sucked, really. This punishment was given when other people were away for darshan, so at least you were saved of the embarrassment. This was reserved for crimes committed for which you were deemed unfit of a darshan. You had to take a pipe and go about washing all the toilets in the floor. While you thought you could get away with just spraying the entire place, John, whose brain works faster than Chacha Chaudhry’s, would come to check up on you. Grindingly, every bathroom, every lav, every wall, would be microscopically inspected before being approved.

The last level was the worst sort. It might seem harmless on the surface, but ask one who has undergone it, and he will tell you the extent of trauma your body has to go through to withstand it. This was one was called ‘Splitting the channa’.

Now, in HS, we were always told that PS had lots of money so they could give us awesome food, while HS was the poorer, more boring cousin. So there were efforts to maximize production by minimising costs. Primary among these efforts was sorting out the channa. Channa was stored in large drums, and after a few days it gave off a nasty smell. Some rocket scientist masquerading as a cook would add new channa to the drum of old channa. To sort out the old channa from the new would be the work of a poor soul like me. I have been subjected to this torture method not once but twice.

I don’t remember the first time. But the second time is vivid. Me and The Dude were caught roaming near East Prashanti during bhajans. This senior who was a maintenance guy (meaning he licked John’s ass a lot) caught us and took us to his master. John, without thinking twice, sentenced us to 2 hours of rigorous channa sorting. The drums of channa were rolled out and we were made to sort the good channa from the bad, in two heaps, while the others ran out to games.

I got to work, sorting out the channa while using extremely high levels of Pranayam. The Dude obviously dint give a rat’s ass, and sat with the calmness of a Zen monk. Calmly, he put his hand right in between the lump and like Moses, divided it into two lumps. I was shocked.

“But that’ll mean everyone in the hostel eats stale channa for lunch”

Calm smile, and The Dude walks off.

If you were among the lucky few, Ganesh Chaturthi was a one week extravaganza that involved bunking classes, darshan and anything else boring. This was among the few indulgences that was in HS, and not PS.

It all began a week before the actual day. Each class made a palanquin in which to take Ganesha to the Kulwant Hall, and eventually to the back of the Sai Gita shed. The juniors were to make palanquins, and from tenth standards onwards they made chariots. The chariots were built like Tata Nano - minimum costs and maximum aerodynamics. The basic structure was a rickety trolley. This trolley would on a normal day be used for carrying sambar from the kitchen to the dining hall, but for that one week, these trolleys were coveted like Jaguars.

The rickety trolley would get four rods to serve as pillars and then the creative energies of a few guys would transform the humble trolley into the 'Chariot' for Lord Ganesha. So anyway, without digressing too much from the topic, lets get back to what the fun part about it was.

Every class had a group of guys who did this work. These Intellectuals put in their creative energies into creating a piece of art.

So these few guys were allowed freedoms. The entire week was bliss.

We were allowed to wake up late, bunk Suprabhatam and John's Daily Dose of Mindfuck. We could then have breakfast late. It was a fun, Godlike feeling to see everyone else scamper when the Second Bell rang, and we would be happily taking our breakfast to the terrace. Somehow, the Chitraannam and cocounut chutney seemed even more tasty then.

This went on for a full, blissful week and the trolleys were transformed beyond recognition.

Then it was the day of the Immersion.

Our chariots would be ready in a week and Ganesha statues installed in each of our chariots with Puja and stuff. Each class got a Ganesha. This was one of the only time we really noticed the statues. Have you ever wondered how Ganesha manages to go around on that poor little rat? No wonder its always hungry and munching on that laddoo forever!

Each class would take out their chariots and palaquins (with their Ganeshas in them) and take out a procession to the Mandir. Each class of 60 singing bhajans, banging the hell out of duffs, and talams clanging along with the cacophony. Now imagine, more than twenty such processions going along, shouting, screaming, breaking coconuts, and generally having a ball of a time.

The screams also had a character of their own. While there was the usual 'Ganapati Bappa Moriya, Aadha laddoo choriya', some creative batches like ours came up with some awesome, completely non-tacky versions like 'Ek Do Teen Chaar- Ganesha is our Superstar'. I know. Sad.

The best part was that the chariots were taken around the Kulwant Hall and kept 'linewise'. If we were lucky, the chariots would be on the Ladies side. This was the only time we could go there after attaining puberty (which it was assumed we all attained in Class 8). This would make us guys ecstatic and we would start behaving animatedly - talking loudly (in a 'grave' voice of course), laugh at stupid jokes to draw attention and take pictures that could be only described as, well, bizzare.

After the photographs and the Prasadam, it was time to take Ganesh on his journey back. This was a more relaxed affair, mixed with a blend of nostalgia. It seemed a little weird. I mean, you create this chariot, install a statue, do puja and stuff, and then throw it in the river? It seemed like all of our efforts were going down the drain.

When we reached Sai Gita shed, our Ganeshas were taken out from the chariots and taken inside the shed. I don't know why Sai Gita shed was chosen to immerse Ganesha. May be it was the whole 'elephant head-elephant head same pinch' thingy they had going. Our chariots felt empty and were dragged back into the hostel compound, ready to be stripped of all their glory and reduced to the sad life of a kitchen trolley.

We then took pictures with our chariots - wearing the costumes that we had to the procession - a wide collection of dresses from Satish Babu, our very own Manish Malhotra whose collections covered the gamut from bhangra to 'Band dress'. There was usually a special dinner in store for us.

The Immersion Day did not have study hours and if we were lucky, Prushty sir and his Oriya boys would show us a thrilling Jackie Chan thriller.

The next morning, we wake up listening to Gantasala on the PA system. We go to Suprabhatam, and then back to classes. Thing fell into place. The honeymoon was over.

Makes me wish Ganesh Chaturthi, like Dussehra was also celebrated for 10 days. Come to think of it, Ganesha handles the Education Department among the Gods - a pretty important one for students. He deserves it.

But anyway, on this day, hope you remember those times. Singing songs, pulling your chariot, and celebrating a festival with your friends.

Happy Ganesh Chaturthi !!

Being Sick

Being sick was one of the best things in school. Don't get me wrong. It's not as if I did not enjoy the hajan-bhajan of daily life. But once in a while, it felt great to remain horizontal and watch all the other guys go about the motions while you drank Viva, and watched Pandavas kick Kauravas' ass.

Most guys like the sympathy that comes with being sick. Not me. Coz most of the times my fevers were marginal, and hugely exaggerated by sad expressions and naagin-style histrionics, which couldn't withstand extreme scrutiny. Calling in sick had to be done with extreme diligence. Too little, and you would be sent right back to class. Too much, and you would be quarantined to the General Hospital, where your only contact with people would be when your classmates would scream "Sai Ram, KVNSPA!" and wave at you while they were returning from darshan.

I remember the early visits to medical room. The large number of medicines stacked in the small room, the kind doctor aunty shooing away kids who come with mosquito bites, and the surreal, hypnotic picture of a Greek healer tending to a patient's leg that hung on the wall. By the time we had reached class, we knew which ailments were treated with homeopathy pills.

Being sick was awesome if your mathematics skills were neanderthal and a Unit Test had just gotten over. You got special mashed rice with rasam, mashed potatoes, Viva, Tinkle comics, and unlimited video shows. All was well till you got on the wrong side of Unnavalli amma. Now, UV amma was very impartial. So whether you were 'sick' or 'alright', she would give you a colourful boquet of abuses.

In high school when the only pleasure in our lives was watching NDTV's Natasha Jog for 15 minutes a day, these sick days were my only solace. Theories about how to get unwell were circulated in advance (put an onion in armpit, play in the sun and stand under a shower, manage to digest both the lunch and dinner etc.) The teachers checked your temperature if you claimed to have fever. I generally resorted to other bunker-friendly ailments like stomach pain, headache, loo-mos etc.

The main reason for me to bunk classes was so that I could read. I was among the tabooed 'readers' of the class. While I didn't have Kate Winslet aunty teaching me about the birds and the bees, I was involved in the flourishing black market of oojaar! inducing novels that did the rounds.

So once the teacher allowed me to stay back in the hostel, out came the novels and my flights of fantasy would begin. I have read some of the best books of my life when I was 'sick'. Sherlock Holmes, Asterix and Tintin, Famous Five, Harry Potter and the Krishnavatara series, all read against the backdrop of morning assembly prayers that seemed to come from a different planet altogether.

Once I was done with the novels, I passed them on to one of my friends, who would fall ill in the next few days.

One among the many quirks that existed in school was the habit of collecting pictures of cricket players. Cricket, you see, was more than a craze. While we were taught that all religions were one, cricket was clearly not included in the list.

Pictures of cricketers would be collected and stuck in scrap books. Quantity was clearly more important than quality here, and so the person who had the most number of pictures was the winner. This resulted in a mad scramble for any picture of a cricketer. Even a Syndicate Bank ad that had Sunil Joshi and Venkatesh Prasad was fought over.

There was a bubble gum in those days called 'Big Fun'. The gums were terrible, but they gave free cricket cards. We chose it over the Big Babool - which was softer and had more flavours. Another source was magazines like Sportstar.

I remember during holidays, I would subscribe to three newspapers, and then cut out the pictures, paste them in my book, and bring it back the next year. We were true connoisseurs. The more desperate ones would resort to more risky techniques to acquire pictures. The only time we got to read newspapers was after lunch. We would have lunch quickly (difficult, when the punishment for eating slowly was being made to sit in the girls' side) and rush to the staff room. We would then request a teacher to give us the newspaper and read the Sports section. This was when the desperate among us would slowly tear the Sports page, fold it to the size of Vim Bar, and sneak it out in the pant pocket.

Cricket stickers had higher value among the collectors. You could exchange a sticker for five 'rare' pictures, two chintapandu balls, a magnet, or a bubble gum. Bubble gums promised a good bargain due to the effort involved in smuggling them into building. On Sunday when there was Parents Meeting, there were 2 guys who went around the ground with a bell, signalling to one and all that it was time. The trick was to make sure that you were among the bell boys. A prior understanding meant you were given bubble gums, which you pocketed and entered the building with the bell, while others were checked in the lobby for things they might have attempted to sneak in.

Coming back to Cricket Stickers. The cricket stickers were valued possessions and played a number of roles. One of them was being paid to seniors as some sort of 'tribute'. I remember a senior who would bully a friend of mine.

"Fellow, pay me 5 cricket stickers,ee"
"I dont have, brother...."
"Then pay me nuggets curry...."

As a result, whenever there was nuggets curry, my friend would eat slowly, wait for the 7th std. guys to say Bramharpanam in the '7th std bass voice', and then give him his nuggets curry. Of course, he could dip his chapathi in rasam or slip it under the mat.

There was this other senior who had a favourite bathroom. One day he saw me coming out his bathroom and stopped me.

"Why you went to my bathroom, ee?"
"It was empty..."
"So? You'll enter off,aa?....Now pay me 10 cricket stickers"
"Ok", I said dejectedly.
"No, pay me a cricket sticker with Sanath Jaysuriya and Sachin Tendulkar drinking coffee"
"From where I'll get that..?"
"Then pay me nuggets curry"

So whenever there was nuggets curry, I stuffed my lunch within seconds and went to the staff room to tear off the Sports page from the newspaper.